Well, things have finally settled down around the CC household. But, let us recap, if for my future memory's failure if nothing else. It has been quite a busy spring and summer. We had:
(1)D's graduation from seminary and all the parties, pomp and circumstance that followed that.
(2)Rather all-inclusive (making it sound resort-like) work project that left me with just enough hours to try to live as well as work
(3)More coursework as I forge ahead to get my PhD tattoo
(4)MOVING to a new town, 2 hours away from our nearest family or friends
(5)Getting to know a new church family and having them all over to our new house...4 meals on 4 nights
(6)Getting cherubs used to the new place and getting them registered and prepared for their new school
(7)Getting new everything arranged and determined (doctors, hairdressers - still need one, banks, gyms, and on and on)
Now that the above is mostly done and over with, I realized that I need some FRIENDS down here. Casual acquaintances, yes, these I have made through church, and they have sufficed for now; but, I stopped for a minute the other day and realized I was a bit lonely for adult female, near my age, chit chat and socialization. I am not looking to make the best friend I ever had down here, I know our stay will likely only be 3 years here, but it would be divine to have someone I could go and get coffee with, someone who understands the challenges of work and motherhood, someone who might like to shop every now and again. I need a girl friend. So, I am not going to sit around and wallow in this, I am going to try to do something about it. So, my current plan is to try to get involved in the kid's school and maybe even the PTO (if you know me well, and are reading this...shut it), perhaps a women's bible study, or finally, put an ad in the local newspaper: friend needed for slightly neurotic, over-committed, impatient working mother of 3 who also happens to be in school (really, I will find time to hang out and chat). I sound delightful don't I?!
Wish me luck!
CC
Friday, August 21, 2009
Thursday, August 13, 2009
All 3 Off
All 3 of my cherubs are off to school. I have a range of emotions flowing, including, but not limited to the following: joy, fear, relief, trepidation, pride, worry, and adoration for my brave kids. They have embraced this new school with gusto and were only claiming to be a little bit nervous. I had the luxury of going to the same school, with the same people, from kindergarten through high school, and some even to undergrad as well. I can't understand what they are facing, but I love their approach, they are brave and adventurous.
Good luck sweeties!!!!!
Life is This Good
Friday, August 07, 2009
From the Mountains to Kindergarten
In an effort to try to eek some fun out of this busy summer..and no, moving is not fun, we have been on a quick getaway to Tennessee. We really are not into country music or anything like that, but we do love beautiful areas and love log cabins, so we thought it would be a good little trip. I booked a gorgeous cabin for us to stay in and we thought we would just putz around, see the sites in Pigeon Forge and Gatlinburg and view some wildlife in the mountains.
Well, our cabin was gorgeous. But, it was flanked in a "rental cabin community" filled with probably 60 other gorgeous cabins, and while it was not really loud or bothersome, it took some of the seclusion out of our vacation festivities. And Pigeon Forge, for us, was a huge disappointment. The shows were overpriced in our opinion and all there were were repeat shops of cheap souvenirs and pancake houses. We spent a good deal of time at one of the kids entertainment facilities called The Track and we played putt-putt and rode rides and ran go-carts. So, this was the most fun for the kids. The most fun for the adults was the hot tub, enough said there.
As for Gatlinburg, it also was filled with things that just don't really interest us and yes, we probably should have done more homework on the place to know in advance we probably would not jive well with it, but it was a quick and easy vacation and we did not over plan. We did go up in one of the sky lifts though and that was fun for all of us to experience. I am a bit nervous of heights so I had to do some mental therapy with myself, but no crisis:). All in all, it was certainly not the best vacation ever, but it was not horrible either and I am very grateful that we were able to get away and relax for a few days, it was needed and we are blessed to have the resources to do so.
We are back now though and Miss Shenzy just had her assessment for early entry into kindergarten (she is too young by 28 days) and she passed with flying colors! Wooooo Hoooo! I was standing outside of the assessment door and was actually getting a bit nervous because I could not hear her answers to several of the questions and I had no idea what she said. I did have a moment of PTSD when I heard the tester because she was asking questions much like I had to when I was a neuropsychometrist ($15 word, I know). I hated being a neuropsychometrist with a burning passion and I made people cry on a daily basis, mostly those with a traumatic brain injury or organic brain disease...it was not cool, and to top it off, I was making $28,000/year with my master's degree...yeah, I didn't make it a year...and I sold out to big pharma and LOVE my job (most days)! Sorry, I digressed, but anyway, back to Shenzy, oh yes, she did fabulously and the assessor came out and said, well, I normally don't tell people, but she is solidly ready and I will call the school and have them call you on Monday!
So, we have only until next Thursday and then all 3 cherubs will be back in school, full time as Kindergarten down here is all day. We also signed them up for gymnastics today and tried to call for scouts, etc, etc...reestablishing your family in a new location is not a quick and easy task!
I am excited by this, I guess a tiny bit sad that my youngest is heading off to kindergarten, but I know she is ready and needs that challenge that school will bring her.
Life is This Good,
CC
Well, our cabin was gorgeous. But, it was flanked in a "rental cabin community" filled with probably 60 other gorgeous cabins, and while it was not really loud or bothersome, it took some of the seclusion out of our vacation festivities. And Pigeon Forge, for us, was a huge disappointment. The shows were overpriced in our opinion and all there were were repeat shops of cheap souvenirs and pancake houses. We spent a good deal of time at one of the kids entertainment facilities called The Track and we played putt-putt and rode rides and ran go-carts. So, this was the most fun for the kids. The most fun for the adults was the hot tub, enough said there.
As for Gatlinburg, it also was filled with things that just don't really interest us and yes, we probably should have done more homework on the place to know in advance we probably would not jive well with it, but it was a quick and easy vacation and we did not over plan. We did go up in one of the sky lifts though and that was fun for all of us to experience. I am a bit nervous of heights so I had to do some mental therapy with myself, but no crisis:). All in all, it was certainly not the best vacation ever, but it was not horrible either and I am very grateful that we were able to get away and relax for a few days, it was needed and we are blessed to have the resources to do so.
We are back now though and Miss Shenzy just had her assessment for early entry into kindergarten (she is too young by 28 days) and she passed with flying colors! Wooooo Hoooo! I was standing outside of the assessment door and was actually getting a bit nervous because I could not hear her answers to several of the questions and I had no idea what she said. I did have a moment of PTSD when I heard the tester because she was asking questions much like I had to when I was a neuropsychometrist ($15 word, I know). I hated being a neuropsychometrist with a burning passion and I made people cry on a daily basis, mostly those with a traumatic brain injury or organic brain disease...it was not cool, and to top it off, I was making $28,000/year with my master's degree...yeah, I didn't make it a year...and I sold out to big pharma and LOVE my job (most days)! Sorry, I digressed, but anyway, back to Shenzy, oh yes, she did fabulously and the assessor came out and said, well, I normally don't tell people, but she is solidly ready and I will call the school and have them call you on Monday!
So, we have only until next Thursday and then all 3 cherubs will be back in school, full time as Kindergarten down here is all day. We also signed them up for gymnastics today and tried to call for scouts, etc, etc...reestablishing your family in a new location is not a quick and easy task!
I am excited by this, I guess a tiny bit sad that my youngest is heading off to kindergarten, but I know she is ready and needs that challenge that school will bring her.
Life is This Good,
CC
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Angel on Earth
I know I have written about my great-grandma before, but, here I go again. My great-grandparents were the solid foundation for my youth. My mom was very young when she had me and she worked tirelessly, multiple jobs, to provide me with everything she never had. I was dressed nicely, in gymnastics, multiple dance classes, played sports, went out with friends, and on and on. Guess who took me to all of these things, who raised me in large portion...yep, my great-grandparents. They loved me beyond measure and even though they had lots of grandchildren and great-grandchildren, I always felt extra-special to them because I was with them so much.
My grandpa had his issues, including chain-smoking, a bit of cleptomania, and prostate and memory issues at the end...but he was a very loving man and he doted on me, perhaps to the extreme. I cannot remember a single softball game that I had that he did not attend, and I played every summer, even through college. After his health declined to the point that walking to the bleachers was tough, he and grandma would get to the field early enough to park along a fence in the outfield and would honk for me when I got a good hit or made a good play (I pitched).
Grandma was a housewife that married wayyyy to young and never worked outside the home. However, I have never met a more frugal, thrifty, and creative woman who always managed to make her own spending money and never failed to try to give it to me. Grandma and I have this special relationship to this day. She nicknamed me Poodie at about 1 week old and she and most of my family still call me this to this day. Grandma taught me so much, things books and education never can.
I visited Grandma yesterday when I was back in my hometown (which is now more than 3 hours from our current home). She will be 92 in September and I make it a priority to see her when I am in town, unfortunately, it is not often enough for her or for me. Her daughter, my grandma (with whom I am not nearly as close...some issues there), was there at the nursing home where Grandma has lived for about 4 years now when I got there with my 3 cherubs. It was nice to see her, but in the beginning she didn't know who I was for a few seconds, but then you could see the recognition hit her eyes and she smiled. She was not having a very good day my grandma said and within minutes, my great-grandma was crying that it was so good to see me and the kids. Grandma also told me that she had been crying earlier because they had made her eat lunch and it is hard for her to swallow and so she found the nursing home staff to be mean. Seeing my great-grandma cry, for any reason, was heart wrenching and all I wanted to do was take away her pain.
I sit here trying to come to terms with the circle of life and how child-like my grandma is now and wishing I was there for her like she was for me when I was the helpless one. She still has my unconditional love and my prayers every single day, but she doesn't have my presence and for that my heart is heavy. I am not in a position where I can quit my job and care for her full-time, but I kind of wish we lived in a society where this was expected and just happened within families as it does in many Asian cultures.
My great-grandma is truly my angel on earth, her love and kindness, her hospitality to all those who entered her home, her laugh, her gentle nature, her amazing cooking, every single thing about her and how she always was brings me happiness. It is very hard for me to reconcile her current being, one I know she is not happy in most of the time, with how she wants to be and how unfair this part of life really is. I don't want my grandma to go, although I know it is inevitable that we all will pass on some day. But, I also don't want her to suffer. An emotional paradox. For now, I will remember that twinkle of remembrance and happiness that she rewards me with when I get to see her and I will cherish her for everything that she symbolizes to me.
CC
My grandpa had his issues, including chain-smoking, a bit of cleptomania, and prostate and memory issues at the end...but he was a very loving man and he doted on me, perhaps to the extreme. I cannot remember a single softball game that I had that he did not attend, and I played every summer, even through college. After his health declined to the point that walking to the bleachers was tough, he and grandma would get to the field early enough to park along a fence in the outfield and would honk for me when I got a good hit or made a good play (I pitched).
Grandma was a housewife that married wayyyy to young and never worked outside the home. However, I have never met a more frugal, thrifty, and creative woman who always managed to make her own spending money and never failed to try to give it to me. Grandma and I have this special relationship to this day. She nicknamed me Poodie at about 1 week old and she and most of my family still call me this to this day. Grandma taught me so much, things books and education never can.
I visited Grandma yesterday when I was back in my hometown (which is now more than 3 hours from our current home). She will be 92 in September and I make it a priority to see her when I am in town, unfortunately, it is not often enough for her or for me. Her daughter, my grandma (with whom I am not nearly as close...some issues there), was there at the nursing home where Grandma has lived for about 4 years now when I got there with my 3 cherubs. It was nice to see her, but in the beginning she didn't know who I was for a few seconds, but then you could see the recognition hit her eyes and she smiled. She was not having a very good day my grandma said and within minutes, my great-grandma was crying that it was so good to see me and the kids. Grandma also told me that she had been crying earlier because they had made her eat lunch and it is hard for her to swallow and so she found the nursing home staff to be mean. Seeing my great-grandma cry, for any reason, was heart wrenching and all I wanted to do was take away her pain.
I sit here trying to come to terms with the circle of life and how child-like my grandma is now and wishing I was there for her like she was for me when I was the helpless one. She still has my unconditional love and my prayers every single day, but she doesn't have my presence and for that my heart is heavy. I am not in a position where I can quit my job and care for her full-time, but I kind of wish we lived in a society where this was expected and just happened within families as it does in many Asian cultures.
My great-grandma is truly my angel on earth, her love and kindness, her hospitality to all those who entered her home, her laugh, her gentle nature, her amazing cooking, every single thing about her and how she always was brings me happiness. It is very hard for me to reconcile her current being, one I know she is not happy in most of the time, with how she wants to be and how unfair this part of life really is. I don't want my grandma to go, although I know it is inevitable that we all will pass on some day. But, I also don't want her to suffer. An emotional paradox. For now, I will remember that twinkle of remembrance and happiness that she rewards me with when I get to see her and I will cherish her for everything that she symbolizes to me.
CC
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Come On Down!!!!!
We have moved. It was exhausting and stressful, but we love it down here. We are abut 2 hours south of where we used to live and there is a slight, but noticeable, difference in culture. The house we are in is probably more than 2x larger than the one we were in before, so that in and of itself makes this a marvelous situation. But wait, there is more!
The people in our new church have truly embraced us with open arms and there is plenty of growth that can be accomplished as this church has been through some trying times and just needs a good leader, and my hubster is that. We have already done our first mission project with them and we, along with the kids, had a really fun time.
I am now officially a teleworker and I could not possibly love it more. I will actually love it more when my desk arrives at the end of the week, until then though I will happily remain on the floor...in my HOME! This working from home thing is going to literally change my life. Dramatic, yes. But true. Already I have enjoyed my evenings more, and feel, in general, less stressed even though we are still in the throes of unpacking and trying to get settled. The hustle and bustle of getting myself ready, kids ready, everybody fed and out the door so that I could make it to work on time was exhausting and I guess after 7 years of doing that with the kids I was a bit spent in the energy department.
School is going to hopefully get accomplished quicker because I have more time back in each day. This should allow me to get that PhD tattoo on my hiney a bit sooner, which will in turn save me a lot of money! I am looking forward to really buckling down and getting it DONE. This semester has not really been a very bad one assignment wise, so I should be embracing this and working on research, but for now I am going to try to get all the way unpacked and settled so that my brain is not competing for tasks on the to-do list.
We signed up at the local YMCA and it is very nice. Should allow the whole fam to get some exercise and spend time together having fun in the pool! Also should allow me to continue on the weight loss journey that has been at a stale mate for almost 2 months now - but the good news is that I have not gained!
We have enjoyed having visitors already in the first week. We are looking forward to our 4th visitor in a little over a week tomorrow and then the 5th and 6th on Tuesday I hope!
That's the update for now...the kiddos are back in our old stomping grounds for VBS this week so we are going to miss them a ton!
CC
The people in our new church have truly embraced us with open arms and there is plenty of growth that can be accomplished as this church has been through some trying times and just needs a good leader, and my hubster is that. We have already done our first mission project with them and we, along with the kids, had a really fun time.
I am now officially a teleworker and I could not possibly love it more. I will actually love it more when my desk arrives at the end of the week, until then though I will happily remain on the floor...in my HOME! This working from home thing is going to literally change my life. Dramatic, yes. But true. Already I have enjoyed my evenings more, and feel, in general, less stressed even though we are still in the throes of unpacking and trying to get settled. The hustle and bustle of getting myself ready, kids ready, everybody fed and out the door so that I could make it to work on time was exhausting and I guess after 7 years of doing that with the kids I was a bit spent in the energy department.
School is going to hopefully get accomplished quicker because I have more time back in each day. This should allow me to get that PhD tattoo on my hiney a bit sooner, which will in turn save me a lot of money! I am looking forward to really buckling down and getting it DONE. This semester has not really been a very bad one assignment wise, so I should be embracing this and working on research, but for now I am going to try to get all the way unpacked and settled so that my brain is not competing for tasks on the to-do list.
We signed up at the local YMCA and it is very nice. Should allow the whole fam to get some exercise and spend time together having fun in the pool! Also should allow me to continue on the weight loss journey that has been at a stale mate for almost 2 months now - but the good news is that I have not gained!
We have enjoyed having visitors already in the first week. We are looking forward to our 4th visitor in a little over a week tomorrow and then the 5th and 6th on Tuesday I hope!
That's the update for now...the kiddos are back in our old stomping grounds for VBS this week so we are going to miss them a ton!
CC
Sunday, June 21, 2009
The Best Dad
I got the raw end of the stick when it came to fathers. I mean, as I have grown up, I have come to realize that my life would have been worse if I had had a mean or abusive father, but I just had no father. There were times when this was awkward or made me feel like an oddball, but in general I must admit that I had a fine upbrining sans a male parent. My mom did an amazing job of putting me first and making sure that I had all the love that one parent can give.
However, I knew that I wanted to have kids, and I knew without a doubt that whoever my spouse was, they had to be a good dad. On this day, Father's Day, I pondered this while sitting through our last church service at our current church, where we have been now for 9 1/2 years. That is a long time! D preached and did a fantastic job but the day definitely has left me contemplative.
So what makes D such a good dad? First and foremost, he loves his wife. He shows it to me and to our children by the way he treats me, talks to me, looks at me, and loves me. He believes that he can only be the best dad to our kids if he and I are in the right place with our relationship. Secondly, he is a very dedicated dad. He loves his children immensely and in no way considers his alone time with them "babysitting" as I have heard some men refer to their solo childcare duties. He does a good job of being strict and teaching the kids what they need to know in order to be successful in this world and being fun and helping them explore the world.
So cheers to my favorite man in the world, my best friend, my partner in parenting, and truly the best person I know.
Happy Father's Day D! Thank you for being you.
Love, CC
However, I knew that I wanted to have kids, and I knew without a doubt that whoever my spouse was, they had to be a good dad. On this day, Father's Day, I pondered this while sitting through our last church service at our current church, where we have been now for 9 1/2 years. That is a long time! D preached and did a fantastic job but the day definitely has left me contemplative.
So what makes D such a good dad? First and foremost, he loves his wife. He shows it to me and to our children by the way he treats me, talks to me, looks at me, and loves me. He believes that he can only be the best dad to our kids if he and I are in the right place with our relationship. Secondly, he is a very dedicated dad. He loves his children immensely and in no way considers his alone time with them "babysitting" as I have heard some men refer to their solo childcare duties. He does a good job of being strict and teaching the kids what they need to know in order to be successful in this world and being fun and helping them explore the world.
So cheers to my favorite man in the world, my best friend, my partner in parenting, and truly the best person I know.
Happy Father's Day D! Thank you for being you.
Love, CC
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Mish Mash
My goodness, it has been a while since I have journaled here. That is 99% due to my job and the rather intense project that I was on for a good while. However, our work was worth it and not only was the FDA impressed with our company and how prepared and transparent we were, they expressed that our presentation should be the "model" for all pharma companies when they go to advisory committee meetings. How is that for a nice warm fuzzy? However, said work was exhausting, mentally draining, kept me away from my family, made it hard to get my homework done, and even caused me a bit of personal heartache. But it is done and hopefully it will result in adolescents with serious mental illness, namely bipolar disorder and schizophrenia, to have increased treatment options which they desperately need.
Back home now and trying to be in the groove, but we are moving soon...so that makes "normal" a bit tricky. D has been fantastic and been holding down the homestead and packing whilst I have been toiling at work. The movers arrive on July 2, so I have exactly 2 weeks to get everything packed and ready to go. This includes my office at work...uggghhh. But, this means that I will be working from home from that point forward as our new place is 2 hours from my office. And that, my friends, is a fantastic and beautiful thing. I have calculated that I will gain at a minimum, 2.5 hours back of my life EACH DAY!!!! This will make a radical difference in my days, hopefully making me a lot less rushed and stressed. My office is literally one door away from my bedroom and my coworkers won't care how my hair or outfit look! I will likely have more time to write my thoughts here for sure:)
This morning, we will head down our children's hospital because Meesta has outpatient eye surgery. While I know he will be fine in my cognitive brain, my emotional brain is rather worried about them putting him under, the negative effects of them "slipping" and nicking his tear duct or eye, you get it, all the typical parental worries. He is doing well with his nerves, if only I can hold mine together and not make him nervous.
All for now....reminding myself that life is this good...
CC
Back home now and trying to be in the groove, but we are moving soon...so that makes "normal" a bit tricky. D has been fantastic and been holding down the homestead and packing whilst I have been toiling at work. The movers arrive on July 2, so I have exactly 2 weeks to get everything packed and ready to go. This includes my office at work...uggghhh. But, this means that I will be working from home from that point forward as our new place is 2 hours from my office. And that, my friends, is a fantastic and beautiful thing. I have calculated that I will gain at a minimum, 2.5 hours back of my life EACH DAY!!!! This will make a radical difference in my days, hopefully making me a lot less rushed and stressed. My office is literally one door away from my bedroom and my coworkers won't care how my hair or outfit look! I will likely have more time to write my thoughts here for sure:)
This morning, we will head down our children's hospital because Meesta has outpatient eye surgery. While I know he will be fine in my cognitive brain, my emotional brain is rather worried about them putting him under, the negative effects of them "slipping" and nicking his tear duct or eye, you get it, all the typical parental worries. He is doing well with his nerves, if only I can hold mine together and not make him nervous.
All for now....reminding myself that life is this good...
CC
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