Well, today was the day that my better half flew off for 9 weeks. Now, at face value this seems like a long time, and it is, and I am emotionally reacting this way. However, I am cognitively reminding myself that it is not 15 months as many families are being subjected to, so I do know it could be much worse.
The Day:
*Woke at 3:00, helped D finish his last minute stuff, went to the car, watched my handsome husband carry our adorable sleeping children to the car, one by one, so tenderly and gentle that I could see how hard this was for him too with every fibre of his being.
*Drove to the airport, tears flowing freely the whole way for me
*Said goodbye to my best friend and had to drive our kids home through rainshowers that only existed in my eyes, but could have benefited from the windshield wipers! The kids did sooo good - they had upset time the night before with him.
*We all went back to bed upon returning home and woke up about 7:00
*Decided all the sheets needed washed, things were not smelling fresh, so stripped all 4 beds (obviously out of my mind) and have proceeded to wash and dry and put sheets back on beds during all of my time at home today
*Had to get everyone ready for the funeral of my great uncle, drove to the town (~1 hour away), funeral, cemetery
*Went and had van washed, went to grocery store, came home, more laundry, fixed supper, went and got D's truck from the church and brought it home (crying all the while)
*Gave the kids baths, finished with beds (seriously, what was I thinking!), read 2 books (Bats at the Beach and I love you Stinky Face), prayers, and now they are hopefully snoozing
I have homework to do. I feel so lonely and lost without D. It is ridiculous as he is home very little most of the time b/c of school and the church, but I guess just knowing that he will be home to sleep and I have access to him if needed helps his absence normally. I have cried buckets, ridiculous I tell you, and my darling children have been absolutely incredible. Doodle is mothering me instead of the other way around and Shenzy keeps telling me to take a deep breath, which is what I tell them when they are crying, and by golly, it does help. Meesta is just walking cautiously, not sure how to react and I can't blame him. I am embarrassed by this extreme emotion, but when it decides to crop up, I am having a difficult time keeping it at bay. Thank God for my children. Time and routine will make this survivable, but right now it really sucks.
Day 1. Only 63 more days to go. I do covet your prayers.
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4 comments:
I will be praying for you sister! You will get through this, for sure, but it might not be very fun....XOXOXOXX
On another note, my brother and I decided to start a blog together, with the MAIN goal to use it as an accountability tool for exercising. So we may only write in and say "I walked for 20 minutes" or whatever, but who knows, maybe we will write more stuff--sibling hijinks if nothing else..... I will send you a link.....or more simply, I think you can get to it using my-real-first-name dot blogspot dot com.
Hi G!
I am so excited that you have started a blog. My goal is to have at least 10 pounds shaved off by the time I see D again, which will be July 3rd when we go to visit him!
Thanks for the prayers, I am hanging on by the thinnest thread.
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Prayers for comfort headed your way. I know it would be very tough for me to be without Bill for that long, and we've only been married 7 years. I can only imagine how much worse it would be if we were together longer. I don't really have any words of comfort, but feel free to email me to vent some emotion if you want.
Heather BT
Thanks Heather, this is rougher than I actually thought...
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