Sunday, May 03, 2009

Turn the Page

I grew up in the 70s with a pretty hip mom and so I know ALL the words to all the Fleetwood Mac and Bob Seager songs out there. I still have a thing for 70s music. Lately, the words of Bob Seager's song, Turn the Page, has been floating between my ears. You see, I am in major transition mode right now. We are about to turn the page on one whole chapter of our life as a couple and as a family and while change is exhilarating, it is also scary.

We still don't know where we are moving but have a hint that if it is where it is currently intended, it would be too far for me to drive to work. This means telecommuting to work. I have been wanting this, looking very forward to it, but now that it is upon me, I do worry a bit about isolation. Despite my lack of chat here, I am a rather social person. I like witty banter, intellectual stimulation with people, and in general really like to hear others' perspectives. While all of this will be possible teleworking, it will just be different. And, it is very likely that from this move on, I will not work within the confines of a traditional office for a long time. Just pondering how it will be, that's all. It is a transition.

I am beginning to realize how much I am going to miss all of the people at our current church. D has worked there for 9 1/2 years now and we have been there since it was just D and I, sans cherubs. This was the church that saw us through a very long and dark year while trying to adopt Doodle and Meesta. This is the church where I feel comfortable and truly enjoy the people. We will be moving to a place where we know NOT A SOUL. Scary and exciting.

This will be the furthest I have technically lived away from my family and while I am going to be okay with it, I am worried about my mom. She loves to be with us. She drives an hour to come see us almost every weekend and if this move is the one, it will be likely at least 2-3 hours' (depending on where it is) drive for her to come and see us. She will take it hard.

I am both excited and nervous for D as this will be a big transition for him. I know he is ready though and am excited to see him spread his wings and truly show the gift that God has given him. I am a bit nervous that this new congregation might think I am a more "traditional" pastor's wife and have expectations of me. I hope that they understand my work and school commitments on top of my wife and mom priorities (always most important).

So, I guess I am just processing here. Big things on the horizon and without the actual knowledge of WHERE (which is really frustrating and downright upsetting to me at this point...and we already know we won't know anything this week...charming, huh?!) it is hard to process all of this in my already full and stressed peabrain.

I want to make this move as positive as I can for everyone, especially the kids, so bear with me as I use this as my venting location. I am excited, but also nervous, and feel unable to prepare as I should be able to due to the "secrecy" that is being made regarding these appointments. Also, work is a bit of a nightmare and I am attempting to survive it and keep up with my schoolwork and so actually think after reviewing all of this, I should seriously get some xana* in my system. I think it might be best for all!

On a positive and non-pensive note, nobody in my family has the swine flu (rather over hyped by the media if you ask me), I have a great job, I have the opportunity to further my education, we bought property and a garage (odd, I know) this past week so have a "home base" of sorts to store our stuff, we are healthy and happy. Go inner Pollyanna!!!

OK, all for now!

Life indeed is this good...and I must remember nothing really good is ever easy...


Anonymous said...

Your post reminded me of another 70's classic, Carly Simon's "Anticipation"... and reminds me so much of how it feels during the adoption wait. You *know* the end result will be good but you don't know how long it will take to get there or how hard the adjustment might be.
Anyway, the good news is the internet means all your friends will still be here for you! So use your blog to vent anytime you need - that's what it's there for. :-)
Praying for you, Friend!

cc said...

Thank you Chris:) Very good analogy!