Colorado Sadness Hits Close to Home

I continue to take some emotional hits from the news lately. Since September 11, 2001, I can’t go without my news fix. I guess I have become a bit of a junky. The news that continues to leek out about the recent shootings at a high school in Colorado have me sad and ANGRY. How dare someone do that?! I have been outraged, but then this morning I read something that made it emotionally worse for me, it hit home a bit more…the girl that was killed, she had a twin brother.

My twins have the most amazing bond and if they are even separated for 10 minutes, they honestly miss each other. I am frequently getting on them because if they walk into a room and don’t SEE the other one, they ask where he/she is?! They are usually in the next room, just LOOK. They are tight. It is cool. They are the best of friends and even yesterday, we were having a conversation while driving to a friend's soccer game about decorating the house for Halloween as we had passed by a dramatically decorated house for Halloween. I informed them that if they wanted to do that to their own homes when they grew up – then they could. CA informed me that he would indeed do that and that I could come over to see it. I asked where he was going to live, close to mom and dad or far away – he said far away…with CM. I asked him if he planned to get married (mind you, they are 5), he said yes, he was going to marry CM. I explained that she was his sister and that she would always be his sister, but never his wife. He then asked, rather seriously, if he had married her at Doodie’s wedding (a good friend of mine who got married almost 2 years ago and they were the ring bearer and flower girl). I explained that no, they had not, he than disagreed with me because she had on the pretty white dress and he had on the bow (tuxedo). Awww, the innocence of youth.

Anyway, this story hits so close to home in that I am sure that her twin brother feels as if he has lost a part of himself. I pray that our kids never experience this pain, this injustice, this incredible sadness.

Here is a quote from CNN.com about the story and a statement about the deceased girl from a family friend, and I will take this challenge/directive seriously and tell you all later what D and I try to do every year already to address this:

“In memory of Emily we would like everyone to go out and do random acts of kindness, random acts of love to your friends or your neighbors or your fellow students because there is no way to make sense of this. It’s what Emily would have wanted.”

How to Raise a Good Brother, Son, Future Husband

I was in S's bedroom this morning getting her ready and I could hear the twins down the hall getting up and ready for school. They were obviously in the bathroom at the same time and all of a sudden I hear a scolding lashed out from CM to her brother "CA, I DO NOT WANT TO SIT ON THE TOILET LIKE THAT, YOU HAVE TO PUT THE SEAT BACK DOWN WHEN YOU ARE FINISHED!" Well, she told him. They are 5.

This little man of ours has 2 rather bossy sisters and a not-so-soft-spoken mom, he does not stand a chance at being a male pig - and his dad is a most of the time, wonderful role model:)

Seriously, some day, some cute chickie had better not give me any grief because we are creating a wonderful, considerate and thoughtful, toilet seat-putting down gentleman for her to enjoy.

Today was a great and calm evening in our household. D had a meeting at church, so when I got off work and met our sitter, we went to the nearest town where we have paid to be a member of their library (while we also have to pay for our little library in our town, it does not offer much). The kids love the library and so do I, we got some books for them, for me, and a couple of new videos. Although I had to pay for the membership, it has already saved a fortune in books!

We came home, had some yummy meatloaf, carrots and potatoes that I had cooked the night before, and then I read them books at the table while they had a rather boring dessert of goldfish - then it was bedtime!

It was great and I truly treasure these times when we can be calm and I can just enjoy being around them. I like them a lot.

CC

Inhumanity of Man

The current headline story in the news is so sickening and sad to me that it makes me question how safe it is to raise children in this society. It is about the "friend" in East St. Louis who first killed her friend by cutting her unborn fetus from her stomach, letting her bleed to death - then killing her other 3 children, placing them in the washer and dryer and then holding a funeral for the dead baby and acting as if it were her own! Seriously, I have heard many things in my time as a mental health counselor - I worked at a Women's Prison and did psychological intakes, I worked in an inpatient PTSD clinic for Vietnam Vets in New Orleans. I have heard some pretty violent and subhuman stuff, but what kind of a mental break must one have to do something like this, to a so-called friend. These 2 women had grown up together and were supposedly friends. What happened?!

I have had disagreements with friends, even recently, they always hurt and there are always two sides to a story - but never have I wanted to physically harm another person. Okay, not quite true, I have on more than one occasion had to walk away from my children because I was so angry - but I did walk away. What makes a person harm someone else in such a manner and not only the cruelty against the woman, but also against her children. Someone like this must be put away for the rest of her life - in solitary - actually, this would be a death penalty case in my opinion. This would probably be letting her off too easily.

This reminds me of the quote from Robert Burns "Man's inhumanity to man makes countless thousands mourn!"

May God be with the family of both the perpetrator and the family of the victims.

CC

Gooooaaaallllllll!!!!!

My son, the one who stands on the soccer fields kicking the dirt with his cleats, picking grass and flowers and rather aimlessly following the bumblee soccer game that he is to be participating in, yes, that is the one. He.scored.a.goal!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I swear it was more exciting than him winning the Nobel Prize or something, now how ridiculous is that! In all fairness, CM scored a goal during their first game and is usually more into it than he is, but this is all about his goal.

He was doing a bit better paying attention to the GAME this time and then all of a sudden, he had the ball and he took it ALL THE WAY DOWN THE FIELD by himself with the others chasing his little frame. D and I and my BF LaLa, along with the other parents from our team, were all cheering and yelling like idiots - me on my feet - it was as if it was happening in slow motion and we were all cheering for him to stop the bomb that was about to blow up the world! Save us CA!!!!!! The grin on his face after he kicked it in was absolutely priceless - he was not quite sure what to do with himself.

It is honestly silly how exciting a 5-year-old's goal was to experience. I guess that is truly what being a parent is all about, I feel their sorrows and their joys - they are truly like having my heart walking around outside of my body.

Now, I know, scoring and winning is not everthing (they don't even keep score - but if they did, we would have been squished every game so far), but this was SO THRILLING!

Soccer Sign Up: $55
Soccer Cleats: $15
Soccer Shorts: $13
Watching your son score a goal: PRICELESS

I will likely have to go on a very strong sedative if any of my kids decide to do something really competitive in school or for life!

CC

Grey's Anatomy...SOON!

Tonight is the night, it is the long-awaited season premiere and I am v. excited! I try not to get in serious like with too many shows, but Grey's is one I cannot miss and one reason I LOVE Tivo and feel it is worth the funds. I love the complexity of all the characters, and the men, well some of them are fine to view. I also do not miss Amazing Race, must see t.v. indeed.

I am trying my best to read more so that the t.v. is not on while D is trying to read his multitude of Seminary books (good grief, there is an immense amount of reading in seminary).

Update later on the Season Premiere. Also lots to talk about, including our trip to see Luong Ung on Tuesday night, it was interesting.

CC

A Breather

This evening has been nice, I had NO WHERE to go. The kids and I watched the Tivo'd Monday Deal or No Deal - they love it. Even little S gets into it, it is a riot. She comes up to me seriously, and asks..."mama - deal or no deal", it is so cute. It was nice. I then let them get into our master garden tub and get all pruny and have a ball. We call this our "play bath", most of the time I give them "quick baths" and they are tolerable to them, but the adore play baths.

The cold season is trying to settle into our abode, but we are doing our best to fight the invasion of the germ monsters, besides the guest bedroom is too messy. Most of the people at work have been sick with colds, sinus infections, etc and somehow I have managed to escape it.

Okay, so sad, I am catching up on Tivo'd stuff now that the kids are in bed and watching a Dr. Phil episode (can't help it!). It is truly shocking how some families live - violence in the home, kids involved. Why must idiot adults drag kids into bad situations?

All for now...

On My Side??

The days are getting much longer, especially for me who feels much better after 8 hours of sleep, as I stay up with D at night while he reads his endless books for Seminary. He is doing so much and I am so proud of him, so I am trying to do my best to be supportive and AWAKE as much as possible. If he has to suffer, I am trying to suffer with him;).

Well, yesterday (Monday) I had a hair appointment at 4 downtown then a church meeting at 7, so it was truly pointless for me to go home until after the meeting. D had the kids for the evening by himself and they all had a good time. I arrived home around 9:30 to the man that resembles my husband, but whose head is bent into a book in a rather sustainable fashion, and decided I needed to be supportive. AND, I always have about 10 million things to get caught up on, so I went to work.

One action was to get C&C’s soccer uniforms clean as they have a game tonight (Tuesday). I went upstairs, gathered all the laundry (or so I thought) and traipsed downstairs to get the machines whirring. [[BTW, those who have the washer and dryer on the same floor as the bedrooms and main bathrooms – you are VERY lucky – I will have this at some point in my life!]] After sorting the myriad of clothes that belong to the 5 of us, the soccer shirts were NOWHERE to be found (yes, I capped that on purpose). This led to a search of the whole *^$) house, including turning on the light in the twins’ room, waking them both up by doing this and finding 1 shirt – yes, just 1, it was CM’s, she was a lucky girl, but I found it between the toy boxes – not where dirty clothes are to go… My dear CA did notice my new hair do, even in his sleepy gaze, this handsome little devil said he liked my hair – some lady in the future is going to thank meJ. I decided that CA was going to be out of luck as I did not have time to find it, and not sure where else to even look?!

This morning, I got up early when D left and went to the dryer to do a switch of laundry from washer to dryer and lo and behold, what did I find staring right at me – CA’s soccer shirt. There is absolutely no other explanation in my mind than God knew that I needed a little extra help, it sent chills down my spine, there is just no way that I missed it in the sorting process, the putting in the washing machine, and then the dryer – no way! So, thanks for the extra help, I need it.

Now, one would think that this extra bit was enough for me for one day – but I am feeling a little extra effort today from God and he is feeling a bit ornery if I do say so myself…there was an idiot driving on the interstate with me this morning, the kind who obviously is not trying to call back work colleagues via voicemail, the kind who needs a fast mustang to compensate for his lacking abilities elsewhere (yeah, I took it there!)…this idiot obviously did not appreciate that a minivan driving mama had dared pass him in his race car. Whatever, I could care less, well after passing him and the other vehicle, I properly got back in the right lane (interstate = fast and slow lane), this idiot gets over and drives right alongside me, purposely, slowing as I need to slow because of the traffic in front of me, I look over to see if I could get over – because I am not paying attention to his game, I am already WORKING, and he is totally smirking and not looking my way. Nu uh – you didn’t! Well, he finally speeds off, trying to leave the silver monster minivan in the dust, and he gets maybe 500 yards in front of me and a big truck with a horse trailer cuts him off and moves into the fast lane – I laughed out loud. I wondered how well he liked his game then. Seriously, why must people be idiots – vehicles are for transportation only in my mind, not games. It is idiots like this that cause accidents – deadly ones. I am sure that he learned no lesson, but I felt like someone was on my side today!

Well, I am writing during my lunch, v. busy at work. Soccer tonight and actually leaving (D&I) during soccer to go to a local university to see a Cambodian speaker tonight – a rare treat.

CC

Not a Song - Just Music

My son had an interesting comment tonight - that's not a song mom, it's just music. Mmmhhh. He was wrong though because they really did start to sing, but it just made me realize how very diffently they view and categorize the world.

I had the opportunity to email with the twins' teacher today and she described them as a "joy to have in class". Now, she could be lying through her teeth, which I hope she isn't, but I honestly welled up with pride that they are good little people. That is so honestly the goal of D and I, we want to raise good people.

As I type this, my work laptop is also running right next to me and because of the current loggin in restrictions, I must use dial-up and it is SO SLOW! I have been burning the candle at 3 ends - if that is even possible. Yesterday, I scurried to the sitter's house, picked up the kids, sped home (safely...), fed the kids a quick supper, got C&C changed into soccer outfits, sped back to the soccer game (2 towns away), and then enjoyed the company of NO ONE else as our own game had been cancelled! GRRRRR.... I didn't get the message because the phone attached to the answering machine was unplugged - but the answering machine light was on so I didn't realize it - and I didn't get the messages they tried to leave - although they have my email, cell phone and work phone as well as D's. Oh well, right.

Then, today, I missed a dentist appointment for C&C because I thought it was at 3, but it was at 2 - they tried to call our HOME - I WORK OUTSIDE THE HOME. It feels that the powers that be are conspiring against me this week and all seems to be pointing to the fact that I am working too much and am overwhelmed at work. I love my job though and just need to set more limits and try to get even more organized.

Today was my great-grandma's 89th birthday and the kids and I went to visit her. It was a great visit. D is doing great in school, I am so proud of him and all that he is juggling too.

The SIL and BIL who lost everything they owned in the fire, are now renting a house and are being told that their house can be repaired - but will have to be gutted.

Well, that is the update for now.

Despite the craziness, life is This Good...

CC

Camp FIRE!

Things have been busier than busy around here, so please forgive the lack of posts, I have certainly missed writing. Lots to catch up on, not sure where to start.




I, disregarding my better judgment, agreed to go camping over Labor Day weekend with my dear spouse, our 3 children, and on the first night our sitter and her family and on the second night, the previous night's crowd, + D's senior high youth group. All in all, it was not bad, but I was exhausted by the experience. The first night we had an A*^%#le near our area who was so loud and drunk that I came this close (imagine scrunched fingers) to marching over there and giving him a piece of my mind. Anyone that stupid, loud and vulgar though was certainly a redneck with a shotgun in the gun rack of his oversized truck - so because I don't choose to leave my babies and hubbie without my harassment and love for now, I did not go over to tie his nether regions in a knot... The second night, I was armed with the number of the park ranger and cell phone was nearby, but they were actually well behaved, so no need to call. It was exhausting though keeping an eye on my 3, especially because I am one who might be called a bit overly cautious. There are no "safe" parameters, therefore, I feel like I needed to be eagle eyes to make sure the kids didn't wander off or get stolen by the next lunatic! All in all though, the kids loved it and D enjoyed it, and I survived:)



We returned to our house on Monday early afternoon and learned that D's sister and brother-in-law's house had burned, badly earlier that day. It is fairly well charred and nothing inside can be saved, very sad. Fortunately, they had insurance and eventually things will be okay. Their contractor and others have said that they think it is structurally sound, so hopefully so. They have had a very rough year, they both lost their fathers within about a month of each other in January and February of this year, and now this, they need a break!

Work has been very busy, lots of projects, but the days are flying by.

We are hosting a dinner/educational event on Saturday called An Evening in Cambodia and it has been very timeconsuming creating all the pieces, organizing, etc. Hopefully it will be a successful event...but exhausting! We are expecting around 60 people and are just hoping that the event will bless someone's life (or many someones), both here and eventually in Cambodia.

D started seminary this week and he has a lot of reading to doooooo (hear Lucy...you've got some 'splaining to do...)! He is so smart though, he will make it through with flying colors.

S, our youngest, has been exceptionally frustrating lately - she refuses to listen. to anything. at all. GGGGRRRRRRR. I guess the Terrible 2s are here indeed, may God help us all through it.

C&C continue to love kindergarten and truly seem to be learning more and changing so much so quickly. They are both playing soccer and it is funny to see them interacting in a group setting with other kids, without me. My son is FAR more social and outgoing and outspoken than I ever would have guessed. When we adopted him, he was the most introverted child ever, he has changed indeed. CM seems to be pretty good at soccer, despite the fact that she would rather socialize with the other girls - she can't seem to help herself when the ball gets near, she has to go for it. She seems to take after me more than I might realize;)

Well, wish me luck getting everything done and surviving the next few days - including our first official soccer game and the Cambodia event and then a cousin's birthday party on Sunday! I need some Calgon...

Life is still THIS GOOD,
CC